Oh hai internet/Russians. I know it's been awhile but I've been busy. Don't worry---I haven't forgotten about you. I actually should be studying for finals and working on homework but ehhh who needs school, right? You people are much more important. Priorities. I know in a previous post I promised you guys a "secret project" and it's still a work in progress but I'll get to that later. I also have been slowly working on a 2012 music review so you have that to look forward to in the next week or so.
I'm currently listening to the new K-E-DOLLARSIGN-S-H-A so I apologize if I'm a little more vulgar than usual. No I don't. Oh shit the guy doing background vocals for the song "Only Wanna Dance With You" sounds like Paul Banks from the band Interpol. Shit, I hope it is. Goddammit there is a point to this post, I swear.
Anyways.
Lately, when I'm not at work I can be found in a coffee shop making an attempt to study but usually just end up talking to my friends. With finals fast approaching, this time has been precious so we've actually been working on assignments and studying hard over multiple cups of coffee in our almost daily meetings. We usually meet around 7:30 pm and work straight on till midnight. We've been frequenting the same coffee shop in a rather large chain of coffee shops because we like the baristas. Most, if not all, seem to recognize us day in and day out and treat us with an almost friendship-like kindness. The one shop visit is one in a very large chain of coffee shops and is by no means the closest location to our homes but we still go out of our way to do our work there due to this stellar staff. We talk to these people. We tip these people. A couple of them even know what drinks I like from memory. That's how close we are to this caffeinated establishment. And it's not just my few friends that these barista's are nice to---after a certain time of night everyone in the shop is a regular visitor. Everyone is super cool to us except for one guy.
This bearded fellow is not a manager or supervisor of any kind---just a regular barista who has been working there for a long time. I've picked up on his rude demeanor before and ignored it, but tonight I just could not help but say something. I have a habit of speaking my mind loudly---thoughts that would usually be reserved for quite comments between friends---if someone is being rude or blatantly arrogant. Sometimes, people are just too frustrating to not say something.
In recent weeks, I've noticed that whenever this guy is working, he tends to plug his mp3 playing contraption into the shop sound system and plays Semisonic's 1998 hit song "Closing Time" ten minutes to closing. The first time he did it, I thought it was clever and a little funny. Two nights later he did it again and my first thought was "Really? everyone in here right now comes in every single day". So naturally I said loudly "That's so clever. Comedic gold right there!" and the people around me gave a chuckle as the guy announced that the place would be closing in ten minutes. I know he heard me because he gave me a funny look but I didn't say anything further. My friend and I packed up our stuff and left.
Tonight, ten minutes to midnight like clockwork, the music cued up and my friends and I all rolled our eyes at each other as the bearded barista stepped out from behind the counter to announce that the shop would be closing in ten minutes. Thirty seconds after his announcement, no on had moved to pack up their things so he added the comment: "That means stop what you're doing and pack up your stuff and leave by twelve" then stomped off to the back room. Seriously, guy? There was no need for that. We heard your announcement the first time and if that wasn't a clue then your song choice certainly was.
Because our table was in earshot of the counter, we overheard another barista ask him why he added the last comment. "I closed on Monday and some people didn't leave until 12:03." Really? You act as if you would be leaving at exactly midnight when you lock the door. For a very, very brief period of time I was a barista for the same chain of coffee houses and I know that no one leaves right when you close. AND on top of that, you have three other people helping you clean up. In theory you should be able to leave in under a half hour with that kind of help.
One of my friends who is usually rather timid even spoke up about this with a not-so-soft "That was rude." While my friends began packing their things, I continued working on my homework. I had ten minutes. I was going to make this guy wait as long as humanly possible. I was determined to be that asshole. Five minutes till, one of the women sitting next to our table walked to the counter and asked for one more beverage. The girl behind the counter happily obliged while the guy glared at the woman in irritation. About three minutes to midnight, a couple walked into the door. An evil smile spread across my face as I began to pack up my things. "I hope they order ten drinks," I whispered to my friends. They lightly chuckled as we creepily listened in to the couple order their drinks. They were greeted with a hyper friendly "Hi how's your night going?" by beard-o, followed by a not so friendly "we close in three minutes". The girl ignored his rudeness and after ordering their drinks commented on the song choice. "Yeah, I play it every time I close in hopes that people will get the hint and leave right away." Ok, ok, I get it. You're closing and you want people to leave. I'm often the closer at my work too and I understand the irritation of lingering people after you close but at the same time i won't complain about it to another customer. That's the business you work in bro, you have to deal with people. It's part of your job to be friendly to paying customers. I get that you want to go home, but there's no need to be rude about it.
He also told that same woman "Yeah, I have to work at 9 tomorrow, so I want to get as much as I can cleaned up now so I don't have to do it in the morning." OOOOOOK. So many things are wrong about his statement. Where do I begin? The shop opens at 6 AM. At the earliest, the opening barista will have to come in at 5 to set up the shop and make sure everything is prepared for the remainder of the day. 5. Not 9. 5. When this guy comes in at 9, the only thing he'll have to do is make some fucking coffee. Don't act like you have sooooo many things to do when you come into work at 9. And even if you did have a million things to do, you have no reason to be rude to paying customers. Your song choice is not clever. Your rude tone is not appreciated. You will no longer be getting my tip, sir.
Stories like this usually have messages or morals at the end right? Well here's mine: If you work in food service or any kind of customer service for that matter, don't be rude to your customers, regular or not. People with these jobs often wonder why they get the asshole customer who purposely hangs around after you've told them you're closed and it's usually because you're the asshole. People can tell when you're tired so they usually know the difference between tired and rude. If you make a snarky comment like this guy, then prepare for a building full of assholes that will purposely make your night irritable. Businesses get regulars because they're friendly. Not overly friendly, but polite friendly. Or maybe overly friendly if that person is into that sort of thing. Whatever. I don't judge. Well, depending on the person. if it was beard-o then I would definitely judge. Because he's a dick.
I have decided that every time this guy closes, I'm going to make his life hell. Because I am an asshole who does not have the tolerance for other assholes. Especially ones who ruin good songs for me.
El Fin.
I know that I promised I would talk about the "secret project" and I wanted to add more to it tonight so you'll really get the gist of what it's about but it's damn near 4 am and I have to be up at like...7:30. So when I post the music review....probably sometime tomorrow...I'll talk about it. I'm sorry. I don't mean to keep you in suspense. I know Russians don't like surprises. Don't kill me.
*Afterthought: So...I thought I had mentioned that I was working on a secret project in an older post but after a quick look at my other blogs I don't think I had mentioned it before now. So SURPRISE! I'm working on a secret project. I must've mentioned it to a friend or thought about mentioning it or I just can't read. I don't know. I'm going to bed.*
