I bought my very first smartphone three years ago ( I was a little behind the times), not knowing what effect this new technology would have on me. I bought my Samsung Galaxy from an old man on Craigslist who had recently moved to Orange County from Canada. He purchased the phone upon his arrival, but soon realized that the Android OS would not sync up to his Macbook. That $160 purchase changed my life.
Our phones are capable of so many things, but most people just use them to play Angry Birds or update their Twitter feeds. Although I play games on my phone more often than I should, I have developed a skill I like to call 'Ninja Photography' or 'Photo Creeping.'
Ninja Photography is a simple concept: take pictures of weird people doing weird things. The number one trick is to not get caught taking the photo.
I am freakishly good taking Ninja photos. I have many methods of evading detection and I will not share all of my secrets, but I will give you a basic tutorial.
Step 1: Find your subject
Finding an interesting subject is not always as easy as it sounds. You have to be observant and know your surroundings. Weird people won't just fall into your lap, you have to be observant and look for them.
Step 2: Keep a straight face and have no shame
You might have to really have to go out of your way to get the photo.
Imagine that you're in a car, stuck in bumper-to-bumper traffic on the freeway. You look at the people in the car next to you, and see a middle-aged man dressed as a clown, picking his over-sized red clown nose.
Could you resist such comedic gold? I know I couldn't.
The trick is to get your cellphone out, turn on the camera feature, and take that picture. If he spots you, try your hardest to keep a straight face and look forward. Act like nothing happened and you didn't even notice the clowning nose-picker.
If the flash on your phone goes off while you take a photo alerting the subject of your presence, quickly start to vigorously shake your phone and utter "Stupid phone..." or something similar. It doesn't always work, but at least you tried.
Step 3: Always have your phone at the ready
Never separate yourself from your phone. It is the most precious tool for a Ninja Photographer. Make sure that your camera app is easy to access on your home screen. This way when you take out your phone, you can quickly click on the camera button and snap your photo for all the world to see.
Step 4: Edit your photo
There are several good editing apps that you can use. Some people just use Instagram, which can work, but it's usually easier to edit on an app that does more than add a filter and change the brightness of the photo. I tend to use PicSay before I post anything on Instagram, creeper photo or no creeper photo.
Cropping is very crucial to this kind of photography. You want to the viewer to focus all of the subject's glory. Sometimes, cropping a photo will sometimes distort the coloring or brightness of the photo making it difficult for the viewer to understand what's going on. That's where the photo editing app comes in handy. You can edit the white balance and all of these things on the app before you post it online or send it via text message for your friends to see.
Step 5: The perfect caption
Finding the perfect caption for any photo can be difficult, but it's extremely important for creeper photos.
You want to try and keep your captions short---one-line if possible. They need to describe what's going on without going into too much detail. These photos are supposed to be funny, and one of the number one rules in comedy is to not go too big on your jokes. Big is not funny. Big is just awkward. Same concept goes for creeper photo captions.
Step 6: Post!
Use whatever platform you choose. Facebook, Tumblr, Instagram, Twitter---it doesn't matter as long as someone sees them.
Here are some of my own examples of Ninja Photography.
So go forth and creep on strangers. It's really more entertaining than it sounds.
Step 1: Find your subject
Finding an interesting subject is not always as easy as it sounds. You have to be observant and know your surroundings. Weird people won't just fall into your lap, you have to be observant and look for them.
Step 2: Keep a straight face and have no shame
You might have to really have to go out of your way to get the photo.
Imagine that you're in a car, stuck in bumper-to-bumper traffic on the freeway. You look at the people in the car next to you, and see a middle-aged man dressed as a clown, picking his over-sized red clown nose.
Could you resist such comedic gold? I know I couldn't.
The trick is to get your cellphone out, turn on the camera feature, and take that picture. If he spots you, try your hardest to keep a straight face and look forward. Act like nothing happened and you didn't even notice the clowning nose-picker.
If the flash on your phone goes off while you take a photo alerting the subject of your presence, quickly start to vigorously shake your phone and utter "Stupid phone..." or something similar. It doesn't always work, but at least you tried.
Step 3: Always have your phone at the ready
Never separate yourself from your phone. It is the most precious tool for a Ninja Photographer. Make sure that your camera app is easy to access on your home screen. This way when you take out your phone, you can quickly click on the camera button and snap your photo for all the world to see.
Step 4: Edit your photo
There are several good editing apps that you can use. Some people just use Instagram, which can work, but it's usually easier to edit on an app that does more than add a filter and change the brightness of the photo. I tend to use PicSay before I post anything on Instagram, creeper photo or no creeper photo.
Cropping is very crucial to this kind of photography. You want to the viewer to focus all of the subject's glory. Sometimes, cropping a photo will sometimes distort the coloring or brightness of the photo making it difficult for the viewer to understand what's going on. That's where the photo editing app comes in handy. You can edit the white balance and all of these things on the app before you post it online or send it via text message for your friends to see.
Step 5: The perfect caption
Finding the perfect caption for any photo can be difficult, but it's extremely important for creeper photos.
You want to try and keep your captions short---one-line if possible. They need to describe what's going on without going into too much detail. These photos are supposed to be funny, and one of the number one rules in comedy is to not go too big on your jokes. Big is not funny. Big is just awkward. Same concept goes for creeper photo captions.
Step 6: Post!
Use whatever platform you choose. Facebook, Tumblr, Instagram, Twitter---it doesn't matter as long as someone sees them.
Here are some of my own examples of Ninja Photography.
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| Zombie Amy Winehouse is very difficult to get a photo of. |
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| Asian Red Riding Hood. |
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| We have a runner. |
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| The Star-Spangled Lady. |
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| Watermelons like to race turtles. |
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| Flower Power. |
So go forth and creep on strangers. It's really more entertaining than it sounds.
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